Short Skirt/Long Jacket

Okay, so I've copied and pasted the lyrics (from my handy dandy iTunes widget that fetches lyrics for me) for the verses from the song "Short Skirt/Long Jacket" by Cake. (anybody need a back-up singer for the game Don't Forget the Lyrics?!)

Can I just say ... I want this girl too?! She is awesome. Except for maybe the burning eyes part. I don't want my eyes to burn like cigarettes. (stop smoking right now if you do!!! it's disgusting pleaseexcusemewhileivomitatthethoughtofanyonesmoking)

A mind like a diamond - a girl who knows what's best? Yes, please.

The right allocations? Fast, thorough, and sharp as a tack? Yes, please. Especially in this economic climate. Where has my 401(k) gone?!

Uninterrupted prosperity? Yes, Yes, Please!

Here's the part that gets me, though. "A voice that is dark like tinted glass".

This isn't a girl. This is a woman. Now, I'm the first to admit that I'm guilty of calling everyone a guy or girl regardless of age. (4, 40, 400, I almost always just say "girl".) But, I think I'm finally going to stop that. I just turned 29, and I should try to embrace maturity. I'm a woman already by some standards (legal, I guess since I'm over 18. Fine, so make it by ONE standard.) But nobody really refers to me as a woman. Young lady, young woman, fine. I have a baby face, so people don't even think I'm over 25 usually. And to old people, 25 is young. Getting married changed me from a Ms. to a Mrs., which made me feel a little womanly. But, how often do I need to use the Mrs.? Hardly at all! (not that I'm complaining. I don't really like Mrs. ick. it sounds old. and frumpy. kind of like 29 sounds.)

So, no wonder I feel empowered whenever I hear this song on my Genius playlist. I want to be a woman who cuts through red tape and picks up slack. I want to be a woman who can handle it all and still fiddle with my hair and be girly in a womanly way.

Maybe what I need is a briefcase and a new suit. Ixnay the briefcase. I just got a new Nine West bag. Maybe just a new pair of heels and a blazer. Yes. This feels right.

Short Skirt/Long Jacket (lyrics)

I want a girl with a mind like a diamond I want a girl who knows what's best I want a girl with shoes that cut And eyes that burn like cigarettes I want a girl with the right allocations Who is fast and thorough and sharp as a tack She is playing with her jewelry, she's putting up her hair She is touring the facility, and picking up slack I want a girl who gets up early I want a girl who stays up late I want a girl with uninterrupted prosperity Who uses a machete to cut through red tape With fingernails that shine like justice And a voice that is dark like tinted glass She is fast, thorough, and sharp as a tack She is touring the facility, and picking up slack I want a girl with a smooth liquidation I want a girl with good dividends At Citibank we will meet accidentally We'll start to talk when she borrows my pen She wants a car with a cup-holder arm rest She wants a car that will get her there She's changing her name from Kitty to Karen She's trading her MG for a white Chrysler Le Baron

Howdy

So, I guess I have a slight Texan twang for certain words. Most people don't notice, but every once in a while, someone will comment on my pronunciation or wording.

Par example:

Everyone Else: green beans

Me: green BEANS (This is true of any type of beans as long as the first word is only one syllable. I don't think I stress the beans so much when I say kidney beans. Then, it's KIDney beans. Maybe this isn't Texan so much as just a bit of sass which is usually attributed to being raised in the South instead of these Yanks I'm surrounded by who pronounce everything correctly, of course.)

Everyone Else: you, you guys, etc.

Me: y'all (Sorry, I stand by it. It's a perfectly acceptable contraction of "you all". Use it. Love it.)

Everyone Else: Aunt, pronounced like it's spelled

Me: Aunt, pronounced like ant (I just can't make myself say Aunt. It feels wrong in my mouth.)

Everyone Else: Texan

Me: Texin :)

and, of course ...

Everyone Else: Husband, pronounced Huzbund.

Me: Husband, pronounced Huzbind.

The other night, I was sleepy and talking nonsense. I said to le husband, "how do you spell huzbind?" And he answered, "H U Z B I N D". I smiled and drifted off to happy sleep. It still makes me smile.

Ta Ta, Holidays

The holidays are officially over in our home. The tree is down, the gift boxes have been broken down and taken out, and now we have order once again.

Now, it's birthday time! Happy birthday month to mois.